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I Hate Birthdays !!

May 14, 2010

Yes, it’s that time of the year, when the counter ticks and the ruthless number, generally called as ‘Age’ increments by 1. I am not a big fan of Birthdays (OK fine! My birthdays; I love other birthdays as I get CAKE).Why do we celebrate birthdays? What is the idea behind celebrating reduction of one more year from your life?  I am not a national hero or something, that people are thanking God for bestowing earth with my holy presence 😉 I am not 10, so that I get those cheesy gifts from my friends. I am not a girl,so that I celebrate each of my birthdays for three consecutive years, henceforth ensuring that my age only progresses to 20 (when I am actually sixty) 😉

So in spite of all my efforts, on May 15th 2010, I will be just one year less than the age where you are legally certified as Uncle (If you haven’t guessed it is 29), I know you are nodding your head in sympathy saying- Life is so cruel…But c’mon cheer me up a little, say things like – For a Man life starts at 30 or Look at Salman Khan, he is 44, yet he is so sexy (Although I haven’t seen the corridors of gym since last two years) or Girls find older man sexier…But No, why would you do that? You are enjoying this deplorable state of mine…Enjoy friends Enjoy, but it will be your birthday as well some day, than I will be the one shouting ‘There is only thing that goes up and doesn’t come down – your age’ at the top of my voice and will savor your pitiable expression..Every dog has its day, you know, so enjoy!! 😦

On top of all this, I see around and I see my friends are getting married in bunches, as if suddenly Cupid has had an overdose of caffeine and it has hit all my buddies with the Alimony- Oh sorry!! Matrimony arrow…What has gone into you people? Relax, go slow. You are giving my family complex and they want to sacrifice me as well on the altar. So please enjoy the Bachelorhood, and let me enjoy as well…

I am remembering the season or F.R.I.E.N.D.S, with birthday episode, where Joey says on Chandler’s 30th birthday – “Why God Why? Why are you doing this to us?’ I echo that feeling and I imagine God must be sipping Coffee on the seventh cloud and thinking – ‘Yes Poor chap, now you know why I am Immortal’. Great, God!! This is another one of the joke that you play consistently with us humans, awesome. And here I am slowly approaching the stages where my Candles will cost more than the cake 😦

And I hate that neighbor of mine, whenever we have a chance encounter in the corridor, she would always say to her dumb 12 year old kid, ‘Beta! Say Namaste to Uncle’, wtf, Uncle!! Madam she is only half my age( if you subtract some five years from my number) and you ask him to call me Uncle. Just wait, when I will have a kid and we will meet in corridor, I will tell my child, ‘Beta! Say Namaste to Grandma!’ then you will feel my pain.

Ok enough with this mourning, I choose to simply ignore this concept, I refuse to abide by it. You are old only when you are old in your mind. And as my dear friend Jack Benny had said –

Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.

So, henceforth, I refuse to believe in the concept of birthdays, I will not disclose my age to anyone, other than official documents. And whoever tries to wish me on my Birthday, remember I will follow you back on yours and make it sure that everyone comes to know your real Age. Beware!!

PS: Guys, Relax! Just wanted to have fun, hence the post. I have loved every single day of my life till now and will make sure that the coming days will be even better. Cheers. And don’t worry, you can wish me-Happy Birthday, I won’t execute my threat. 😉

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Oye Lucky,Lucky Oye !!

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25 Comments leave one →
  1. May 29, 2010 2:24 pm

    Belated Happy b’day! Btw one doesn’t need to know much of you to find out that you turned 29 this year! One year short of 30

    • May 29, 2010 2:26 pm

      Thanks a lot..But i didn’t get ur comment…

      • May 29, 2010 2:29 pm

        I meant the big hoopla you made about your age being a secret- is actually an open one. If you are born in 81 ( as your blog name suggests) you turned 29 this yr 🙂

        • May 29, 2010 2:32 pm

          Hahaha..you are very observant..This post was just a little fun on m birthday, nothing serious abt it..I am very happy with my stage of my life 🙂

          • May 29, 2010 2:35 pm

            When you don’t have a choice its best to make the most of it and enjoy!!!

  2. May 18, 2010 11:15 am

    LOL, Rahul, Happy Birthday to you (Belated, of course), but still with good wishes.

    ROFL @ that Uncle and Grandma !!! 🙂

    You find it harder to think that every birthday your life span is reduced by a year…while everyday, its reduced by one day. Enjoy life for the present and this time !!! Have a great year ahead…. 🙂

    • May 18, 2010 11:26 am

      Thanks Uma, i love my life and i enjoi it exponentially evey day..Thanks for droppin in !!

  3. May 17, 2010 8:56 pm

    I love birthdays..I declare it everywhere when my birthday is there..I call up people to remember it and call them on my birthday if they forget to wish me. I am not a kind who will sulk the whole day and next few days as my close friend forgot to wish me..

    you know, I am so used to be called an Aunty as I got married pretty early. So since 22, I am an Aunty! but thik hai, who cares 🙂

    It’s said – Growing old is inevitable but growing up is optional 🙂

    • May 17, 2010 9:00 pm

      Hahaha..Gr8..Thanks Neha for visiting my blog..You know this post was just outcome of very good mood thats all..Keep droppin in !!

  4. Mili permalink
    May 17, 2010 7:22 pm

    RSVP Uncle, dont blame the kids for calling you uncle… 😉 lol…

    I am glad, I havent heard aunty yet..But sure when I come back to India..thats how I will be welcomed..Oh No..Cant even imagine, people calling me Mili Aunty.. lol 😉

    Neverthelss, enjoy the birthday..esp the 30th one coz thats gonna stick for a long time!!

    ~M

    P.S. : Love the look of your blog…!! Seems wordpress is better than blogspot.

    • May 17, 2010 7:26 pm

      Thanks Milo !! Welcome to my blog !! Hey dont talk abt 30th one, i havnt got over the 29th one yet 😉

  5. May 16, 2010 2:34 pm

    Well, the quote you have mentioned says it all! [Age is strictly a case of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.]

    I have a friend of mine who celebrates birthdays with not so privileged kids feeding them on that special day. There is no fun in enjoying with those who are blessed with 3 times stomach-full of food. The joy that you get to see on those kids is no comparable!

    • May 16, 2010 2:36 pm

      Hey Thanks Mohan, I agree with your point. But then you dont need one day in the year to share right..Thanks for droppin in !!

  6. May 15, 2010 3:30 pm

    So i’ve landed up in your blog on the right time!! Happy B’day uncle 😛

  7. May 15, 2010 1:54 pm

    Happy Birthday!
    I know how you must have felt after the word “uncle” fell on your ears (an older friend had experienced the same and he keeps nagging about it). 😛
    Anyway, you never stop amazing me with your writing. Hope I catch up to you someday.
    Happy B’day once again! 😀
    Enjoy! 🙂

    • May 15, 2010 3:46 pm

      Thanks a lot Enigma !! World is a small place and coincidence is a beautiful concept..So hope we will meet !! Thanks for the wishes !!

      • May 15, 2010 5:14 pm

        Hope I catch up to you some day(I meant, in writing).
        Anyway, doesn’t matter. 🙂

  8. Nihit permalink
    May 15, 2010 10:58 am

    Dude… Abhi tak Uncle wali stage aayi nahi hai.. but m dreading the day when some kid calls me uncle…

    I’ll give u an advice.. STAY AWAY FROM KIDS

    • May 15, 2010 11:02 am

      Good Advice Bro..but In India with 1.1 billion people, its kinda hard 🙂

  9. daps1312 permalink
    May 15, 2010 10:54 am

    “And here I am slowly approaching the stages where my Candles will cost more than the cake” – HAHAHAHAHA

    I feel so sorry for you … oops 😉 dont worry I hope inflation takes care of the cost of cake being higher than the candles, if thats some consolation 😉

    Anyways awesome post.. Keep blogging 🙂

    And Yes.. Happy 29th Birthday 😉

    • May 15, 2010 10:56 am

      As i said..enjoy my day ppl..ur bday will also come 😉 thanks Bagati..thanks for dropping in !!

  10. k1th permalink
    May 15, 2010 9:10 am

    “‘Beta! Say Namaste to Grandma!’ ” lol lol 😀 😀 😀 da best revenge … these days im also getting soem uncle calls !! will execute this idea 😀 😀

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